Insomniac Blues

Sleep mocks me.

I want sleep. I love sleep. I need sleep. Sleep won't return my phone calls. It's with some other girl right now, I know it!

Since sleep is out catting around, I go to my mistress, the internet, to keep me company.

Friday I came home and made it into my pajamas and sacked out on my bed telling myself that this time, I *was* going to finish watching Riding Giants. Then 20 minutes into it when I was learning about tow-in surfing, the phone rang. It was Angie. She wanted me to come over, and I always do what she says. (y'all, she's short, but she's *bossy*)

We went to El Tap and there were entirely too many teenagers there and all of them got on my nerves. Some were drinking, which I guess means I've gotten really shitty at figuring out how old people are. I had one margarita, and with the stress from work, the lack of sleep (and gallbladder) I was one tipsy bitch. Angie and I got back to her house and watched part of a movie (House) we've both seen many times, but couldn't remember anything about. Then we watched Dateline NBC.

Party. Animals.

Dateline NBC (or was it 20/20?) was about this con man in Texas that married, dated, and/or impregnanted about 10 girls. They interviewed some of the girls, and they met for the first time, then they interviewed him from jail. It was pretty rad. I think I even said "oh SNAP!" But it led to this conversation:

Angie: I'm *never* getting married again.

Me: Hope not.

Angie: I mean, if I was to ever be single again.. I'd never get married, I'd just shack up.

Me: I'm never getting married again.

Angie: You will too.

Me: No, I won't. I'm telling you, I don't have it in me to go through all that.

Angie: You could one day!

(don't you love how she just said she would never, but then wants ME to?)

Me: Who the hell am I gonna marry? Who?

Angie: Bon Jovi.

Me: Bon Jovi is already married.

Angie: SO? He could get a divorce!

Me: Why in the *hell* did you say Bon Jovi anyway?

Angie: I opened my mouth, and that's what came out.

Me: You need to give that shit more thought. Though I *could* invite Richie Sambora over for dinner

Angie: You so could.

Me: I'd be like "Richie, tell me this, why did you divorce Heather Locklear? You ain't getting better looking, my friend"

Angie: He didn't start out that good looking.

Me: I heard he's dating that chick, is it Denise Richards? And she's supposed to be Heather's best friend.

Angie: I know! Bitch.

Me: You'd better not date Bon Jovi if I divorce him.

Angie: I would NEVER do that.

Me: Yeah, but he'd be all "But I'm Bon Jovi!"

Angie: I'd say "I can't do that to her, she is my best friend!"

Me: And he'd just say "I do not think you heard me, madam, I am BON JOVI"

Angie: Yeah.. okay maybe I would.

Me: Triflin' bitch.