Movie Minute

I just watched Ultraviolet, and as much as I tried to be forgiving cause Milla Jovovich is in it, it is so terrible.

It's like they threw scenes into a hat and chose one. The movie goes like this.

Sexy girl, leather, glasses, hair. Impossible mission. Almost getting away. Guns. Swinging hair. Hair color change. Sunglasses lens change. Girl faces insurmountable odds. Stairwell running. You'll never get away. Ha, watch me. More insurmountable odds. Stairwell. Machine guns. Stairwell. Swords for arms.

Insanely improbable motorcycle/car/helicopter chase.

What passes for a plot this day. Trickery. More getting away. More stairwell running. More insurmountable odds. You'll never get off this roof. Ha, watch me. Hair color change, lens change. Machine guns. Fighting. Faux touching moment.

(and then I really quit paying attention, but I could hear it, and it went something like...)

Fight. Fighty fight. Touching moment. Fight. Touching moment. Techno music! Fight! Machine guns!

INSURMOUNTABLE ODDS, I say to you! Hair change. Touching moment. Big scary soundtrack. Are you crazy, you can't do this! Ha, watch me.

(okay cause then I changed it cause you know, The L Word series premeire! hello, must watch!!)

But I bet it ended like this:

Hair color change. Techno music! Fighty fight fight! Machine guns! Stairwell. Stairwell. Guns! Stairwell. Fight! Running on top of buildings! Fight! Guns! Swords!

Touching moment.

Hair color change!