Oh, Blogger

Angie's grandmother died this week. Her funeral was yesterday. It was very cold, and gray, and we were all off-tune when we sang "I'll Fly Away". It is near impossible to tell you how useless I felt watching Angie cry, or how she's lost almost all of that side of her family in a such a short time. It was completely heartbreaking, and all I could do was stand there and try to protect her from people I knew she didn't want to talk to. She said I was a Lioness, her protector. All I know, is that I was ready to slap some fat, flapping, southern-gothic, crazy mother fucking mouths out there.

Plus, fuck, dude. I really loved her grandmother. I didn't have much to call my own, and in junior high we used to spend the night over there sometimes. Her grandparents absolutely loved me, and I got hugs, and .. blah blah .. shit, I don't even want to talk about it.

I got to work today, and when I asked where one of my buddies was, found out that she won't be coming back to work. It's a sad situation that is bumming me out big time. My heart feels so heavy today. I will miss her. She might have been the dirtiest person here besides me, and now when I say something filthy I will have no one to bust out with a scratchy little smokers laugh. I won't have her here to stop at my door every morning and clap and say "Yaaaaay, Cookie!" And, she never judged me for not having a lighter even though I'm a smoker. It's the little things I will miss.

In happier news, something really silly happened the other day. I went to knitting, and then we all went to Villa to eat, and of course I dripped salsa on my shirt. I felt the way you always do when you have a stain on your shirt.. like a moron. So, my friend Kris, seeing my dilemma, said "Hey Cookie.." and when I looked up, he threw the salsa from his chip onto his shirt so I wouldn't feel alone.

Like I said. It's the little things.